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Last week’s Locker WOD winner: Jacque!


COVID - 19 Gym Policy

3/16/2020

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The gym will be unaffected and will have normal hours.  The next paragraph is a quick rant on something that I feel is more important than what is being put out by the media and something they are specifically not mentioning.  After that are the gyms containment policies.

While everyone is focused on Carona, there is a bill in congress to remove internet encryption.  Here is the Forbes article.  I love how they call it the "Earn it Bill."  Just like the Patriot Act.  Not only is this wrong on a personal level, but think about how much business will go overseas, just because people will feel safer not having the US government (and everyone else with the means to use the same measures) go through everything that is done on the internet, credit cards, emails, etc.  They don't use the word encryption in the writing, they just state that government has a right to see everything.  Well if you can see it, it isn't encrypted.

Now back to the virus containment procedures.  I'm setting DEFCON - 2 at the gym, which just means we are actively having this conversation.

Turns out you are responsible for your own health and  safety.  Surprise!  Honestly if you are working out at a gym of any kind, you probably have a strong handle on this concept.  It is not the government, your boss, or your landlords job to keep you from gaining weight, dancing in traffic or catching any virus whether it is this one, the flu, the Rhinovirus (Common Cold), etc.  

Since they closed down the school system, there will probably be more kids at the gym.  Kids touch everything.  You have been warned.  Turns out that we have this occur annually every year in June, July and August.

Your mom has a vested interest in seeing grandchildren, so she would tell you to wash your hands.  Listen to her.

Here is the official gym policy.  Surgical wipes are available along the wall.  There is a secret stash behind the bleachers since we moved the bleachers.  You have no idea who used a barbell before you, and who they were in contact with before they walked in.  So feel free to wipe down the equipment before you use it to protect yourself and after if you feel obligated to protect others.  Or if you don't care, I don't care.  Seriously.  If you feel like washing your hands after working out, that will probably keep you even safer and there is hand soap at both sinks.  As full disclosure the surgical wipes are supposed to be handled with gloves, mostly in the state of California, because they are pretty strong.

If any trainers get symptomatic they won't come in.  If you or your immediate family are symptomatic with in the last couple days, you shouldn't either.  In the case that a majority of the trainers become symptomatic we will step up to DEFCON 3.  The official policy at level 3 is that I will unlock the door before anyone arrives.  Since this virus is respiratory, I will deposit a shot glass and bottle of whiskey on the desk, for a single dose to be taken by members as they exit. Then I will wipe off the door knob as I leave.  I will return after hours if necessary to lock up and remove any zombies / transients.  The gym will remain open and members will be free to either perform workouts OFP or follow the website programming.

Much of this was satire, some of it wasn't.

-C-


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